Baby Alive

Who would have thought that God would ever want me to be a mother. Well the thought would often cross my mind, but I NEVER thought I would ever be given the responsibility of being a mother to a baby. A real baby. For those who know me this is BIG!!! I deal with two and older, anything younger that can't walk, talk, feed or change itself goes to anyone other than me. Seriously, I should be embarrassed but I'm not. I still don't know how to change a baby's diaper. Guess I have some lessons to learn. Unless Aunt Ne-Ne got that area covered.

I have never seen myself as maternal. Yea, I consider myself caring, compassionate, soft-hearted and certainly willing to do anything for the ones I love, but it takes it to a whole new level to be responsible for a itty bitty baby. Wow, I'm gonna be a mommy, God-willing.

Though I am blessed that God entrusts me with His child, I am too afraid to get excited just yet. I guess I am not like many women that feel the excitement from the moment they find out. Disbelief and questioning how did this happen is more like it for me. But to be able to give my husband the best gift on earth grounds me and helps me to appreciate every aspect of this pregnancy. He is truly ecstatic that he is going to be a daddy.

As of yesterday we were 14 weeks. This is a huge feat considering all of the complications we have been having. Let's see, this week has been a good week. I am taking this pregnancy day by day because of the complications. We heard the heartbeat last Friday at the doctor's appointment and I found out that I am underweight. Somehow I must gain 10 pounds in 3 weeks. You may think it is easy but I drop weight like my sister downs a Pepsi. And now that I am pregnant it is worse. I am always hungry but never have a taste for anything, unless it's fruit!

I am trying to get use to talking to my "belly"...... baby :)! I know they say that helps with brain development. I'm all for geniuses but can't quite wrap my head around the fact that I don't feel pregnant so why should I talk to my belly?! Rationally I know my baby is in there (begging for water, LOL). Who would have ever thought that water would be my best friend. You see me, and you see water. I am not kidding. I have found myself saying on more than one occasion, "wow that is some good water". I know, only God could make that one happen.

Let's see, the baby is about the size of a lemon (1-1/2 inches) and I think is sucking his/her thumb. That's a habit Baby Melvin will have to get rid of as soon as they come out (LOL)!

All in all today was a good day. I am restricted from too much physical, mental, and emotional stress. That's funny considering that Tasha is synonymous with STRESS!! Between work and school I can't run from it. I was told that I was being selfish today because I allow myself to be stressed. Funny!

So, over the course of this pregnancy I will give you the ins and outs of my experience being pregnant. So for now I will sign off and try to work more on this paper. Besides I think it is time for another feeding. Funny, they have me on scheduled feedings..... all I want is water!